nOt jUst debRis

February 25, 2006 is actually the closing of the National Astronomy Week (NAW) celebration, and THE DAY I GET MY HANDS INTO A REAL TELESCOPE!!!! Thanks to the USC Astronomical Society and its founder, Christopher Go, for having this Saturn Watch ‘06 held at the soccer field in our school. I invited a few acquaintances, and dragged my cousin along with me cause she also has this ‘interest’ in astronomy. Thanks big to you, peng!hehe.. Well, she is the only person I can talk to when it comes to this matter.  Others would think I’m mad!hehe…:) 

Well anyway, I knew about this since Thursday.  My eyes went big seeing the poster, getting enthused while the reading went! gosh! I could go efffffff…. Really got excited. Very excited. Let’s just forget about how I get through with Friday, okay? Let’s start with how Saturday "day" went. 

It started while I was sleeping.  ngsugod jud sa katulog!!! toink kaau! LOLz  yeah, really, it did.  I dreamt about getting into the "Saturn Watch activity" and I was not allowed to get inside.  I was sad and dishearted and embarrassed (of course i invited pips noh!!ü).  The reason was that the activity was exclusive only for members of the USC Astronomical Society.. mean!! hu..hu.. but when I woke up, I didn’t mind that obtusedly ridiculous dream. 

I left home earlier than I thought.  The activity starts at 8:00pm and I left the house at 3 pm.  I just wanted to make sure I wouldn’t miss this since I have to travel about an hour and a half in going to the place so I decided to see some relatives in the city while waiting for the time.  so blah.. blah.. blah..

Since morning, the skies didn’t cooperate with the activity.  There were rainshowers and the sky was really ‘muddy’, until the early evening.  I was even skeptical in going because of this atmospheric condition.  I was thinking that the said event would be postponed to another day.  but still, I came.  I WAS THERE! excited gud! lolz..  :D    Truly i was thrilled and frantic at the same time.  I could still remember the dream, that’s why, f-r-a-n-t-i-c. But all went well.  I was able to get inside, with my cousin and two friends, michael and anthony. 

T’was still a bit cloudy when we got there but in just minutes, to my amazement, the clouds gradually gave way. The scope was set-up and there were people around.  Most of them are in high school. hhmmmpp… =)   yea, the scope. wow the scope.  it’s really grand!  it’s a Celestron C11 scope.  amazingly amazing!!!  and it really can be pointed up the azimuth at really 90 degrees, huh! wicked. guess twas because of its German equitorial mount (guesszz so. another half-truth! hihi..). YEAH!!!!   and here i go:

Now there I was(at 9:30 pm), looking into the scope in awe, gazing at the wondrous baffling saturn  and its phenomenal rings, examining it.  T’was kinda golden(maybe because of the lens or the wavelength or, i dunno. just half-truth, huh) and the rings posed vertically.  I was looking for the Cassini space (a gap between the ring), and implausibly found it. But it was not long since there were also people in queue, eager to see Saturn too.  Then there was a little lecture.  Photos of Saturn and some of the planets (Jupiter and Mars) were showcased. Then a little stargazing was done.

Got a little chat with Mr. Go’s buddy, Mr. Tomio Akutsu(i think that’s the name! hihi…), the japanese guy..I guess he worked in an observatory. Was amusing when he asked a couple of fellow participants the meaning of "cge-cge", then they said something like ‘go! go!’  (which i think, really is, although there’s no exact translation to that in english).  When finally the telescope gave up (something was wrong with it, Mr. Go said the motor is not working, or so…) and it could only last for a while, he then shouted "go!go! cge-cge!"  LOLz getting offbeat, right?heheh…ü that’s just a lil ‘tête-à-tête’..  :D  Anyhow, we’d just left before everybody does (i mean before the acrivity actually ended), since it’s already getting late.

                                              haaayyy…!! twas just splendid. 

                                                    I couldn’t help but marvel.

                                                        I shall say, it’s fulfilling. 

                                             All that comes out is "WOW!".

Ofcourse, it doesn’t end in there.  More to come… abangan!

Valentines Day.  Everybody in school is very busy, with all the roses and sweets sold in the campus.  Everybody celebrates love.  Celebrating "it" in ways unique, as unique as every individual. M e? With just a simple greeting… HAPPY VALENTINES DAY everyone!   

in just a week from now, valentines day it is.. the "being-single-is-lonesome syndrome" is all around.  It’s sad but feel better knowing that I’m not alone.  I mean, not alone, having the same syndrome. whahahaha! *grinning* lol

I’ve always been whining and complaining, in almost everything.  It’s childish, I know.  Being thankful for what I have and be contented with it, is the right thing to do, despite my inadequateness.  But still, I whine since it’s my way of shooing off inner  emotions…

January 23, 2006 - I was saddened by the news of the untimely death of ka-Ernie Baron.  =(    ‘I wanted to meet him in person’, is one of my childhood wish.  I looked up to him. amazed by his genuisities.  bad.

ANyway, got this poem from the net, a poem for him.  I can’t make onE… I’m  bad aT woRds, so here:

THE LAST WEATHER REPORT

the wise weatherman dies;
his face as familiar as
local monsoon rains.
local network mourns

passing of pixellated monarch
on Philippine television screen.
he is also the undisputed
king of trivia, knowing even the

most trivial of things. his
final report indicates that death
is as inevitable as today’s sunset at
6:03 pm; like tomorrow’s

cloudy skies and scattered
rainshowers. towards the end
of the segment, he says:

trivia: yes, death is
like evening news
like weather report
like pointing rod on Philippine map;

inevitable.

and let us remember:
when there is no knowledge,
there is no power.

bye-bye.

                             -anonymous-         

more about ka-ernie:

http://beta.inq7.net/common/print.php?index=1&story_id=66680&site_id=42

for the past few months until recently, i’ve never gone under the sky again. :(   i realized that i don’t have the luxury of time to do it.  I haven’t lose interest, it’s just that, maybe, (besides of time), i couldn’t take myself to another level, not just merely locating objects, but also take a closer look.  Crossing my fingers, that someday will come, I’m gonna own a telescope or at least a good pair of bino…  haaayy!

“When one has weighed the Sun in balance, and measured the steps of the Moon, and mapped out the seven heavens, there still remains oneself.

Who can calculate the orbit of his own soul?”

“We are all in the gutter, only some of us are looking at the stars.”

– Oscar Wilde

Let me start with a story, and here it goes:

One day an expert in time management was speaking to a group of business students and, to drive home a point, used an illustration those students will never forget.

As he stood in front of the group of high powered overachievers he said, "Okay, time for a quiz." Then he pulled out a one-gallon, wide mouth mason jar and set it on the table in front of him. Then he produced about a dozen fist-sized rocks and carefully place them, one at a time, into the jar. When the jar was filled to the top and no more rocks would fit inside, he asked, "Is this jar full?" Everyone in the class said, "Yes." Then he said, "Really?" 

He reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel. Then he dumped some gravel in and shook the jar causing pieces of gravel to work themselves down into the space between the big rocks. Then he asked the group once more, "Is the jar full?"

By this time the class was on to him. "Probably not," one of them answered. "Good!" he replied. He reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in the jar and it went into all of the spaces left between the rock and the gravel.

Once more he asked the question, "Is this jar full?" "No!" the class shouted. Once again he said, "Good." Then he grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it in until the jar was filled to the brim.

Then he looked at the class and asked, "What is the point of this illustration?" One eager beaver raised his hand and said, "The point is, no matter how full your schedule is, if you try really hard you can always fit some more things in it!" "No," the speaker replied, "that’s not the point. The truth this illustration teaches us is: "

"If you don’t put the big rocks in first, you’ll never get them in at all."

So now I’m asking myself. What are the big rocks in my life then. I couldn’t figure out instantly. Should it be my studies? My tutoring? Family? Faith?  Dreams? Interests? Love(?!?%#&%^&)? and the list goes on…

*thinking deep* I’m such a mess!  I really couldn’t figure out. Certain dilemma comes into the picture and it’s truly ripping my mind. grrr!

Well ideally, my family comes first, then my studies and dreams(they’re just one, of course) then interests. Love?? should be the first. On the contrary, considering the reality, contemplating on what is actually happening, things really do get complicated. Then, LIFE, as they say is really not that easy, i realized(well it’s always been, nka-think lang ko!LOL *serious ra kaau noh?hihi..*).  However, doing the right thing is surely the best one to be in the highest regard. But then again, how can I think of that when I’m in a total mess? tsk..tsk.. sooo many things to fix.  Hope I’ll not be too busy fixing… so help me God

on the picture: that was me when I was still a baby posing with my favorite aunt at the plaza just across the Law Office of my grandfather(eternal rest be granted unto him) in Dipolog CIty. opaw kaau ko noh? hehe.. pero cute! LOL

t’was just an ordinary night of December, two years ago, I was scanning the sky, enjoyed glancing at bright objects above, especially Venus.  She was extraordinarily bright that evening and twas awesome. Beautiful. Then just wondered where my star, adhara, was. I had always known her location during my elementary days but lost track and I just couldn’t remember anymore. Sad, it was.  Not very far from where Venus was, another bright body captivated me.  Well, this time, I didn’t know what it was.  SO, research, research! hehehe… So, twas, Sirius, then. 

EUREKAS!! 

And there was my star.  I was very happy.  Adhara and Sirius is just on the same constellation and not the hard way that I found it.

yeehey! ADHARA’s been spotted!! 

Remembering myself that night, I have wished, it also isn’t that hard to find myself. hu..hu..hu…  I really feel lost these times.  It’s Christmas, and I don’t feel the same way that I felt during Christmasses, the previous years.  Is it just me? or it’s really the way things should be?%$%^*& 

I wished for a better me this coming 2006…  I wished to SPOT the real me.  I wished to be myself again. I wished to be the self that I am.

haayy! libog noh? ako sad nglibog…  *smiles*

one year has been added.  When somebody would ask my antiquity on earth, damn!(hihi..)  another year is added!hu..hu..hu..  ka-sad..

anyway, at one point, I know I should be thankful. Thankful for countless reasons…  It’s just that I counldn’t be considered a kid.. dli na cya matabang!hu..hu..hu..  Really, scary it is, to think about all that I will go through.  It’s gonna be a very long journey and it’s a tough one.  And it’s getting tougher and tougher and tagher, and taffer! :(  It surely does…  Really, I’m scared.  I’m scared of breaking, I’m scared of losing, I’m scared of what isn’t expected. whew!  Lord would help me and guide me, I know.  That’s why I’m still here…

Well, anyway, Godspeed to me!

NOTE: that’s my cake over there. seen it? *sponsored by Goldilocks* LOL

LIfe now iS reaLLy verY bUsy. bUt to Me, when tHis fRustratioN peeKs at mY peAcefuL day-to-day life, I jUst can’t sAy "NO". hu..hu..hu..  vIoLin is my #1 fRustratIon!!!  aLL I caN do nOw iS jUst tHink ’bout it.. haayy! ka-Sad sa liFe..

iT sTarteD..  wIth a pHone caLL. fRiend toLd mE thaT tHerE’s tHis vIo at our bAtchmaTe’s boardIng pLace. ThEn I wEnt tHerE. I pLayed, bUt I dunNo hOw tO.  nOw tHe pRobleM is, I cAn’t gEt it oFF my mInd! 

miSeri… miSeri…  now I’m lOst!